Good month to none of you and a good day to you all! I come here to write this message exclusively for my benefit and hope none of you will ever touch it with a ten-foot-pencil-sharpener! I’ve only just returned from La La Land, the place where only poisonberries grow on trees and money can never be found except underground, guarded by huge hordes of humbugs. Acid is important in life. If you know nothing else in life, know this: keep acid on you at all times. Not in a jar or vial, but rather literally all over you. Hopefully it will help you grow into the wonderful nice man or woman you hope (and all of your family fervently hopes) you will become. All my death-grip-hugs and kisses of torture! Rat-at-at-at for now, my lovely woodpecking hummingbirds! I blow a thousand cigar-smoke rings in the general direction of your dead stuffed cat and the urn that contains your grandfather’s ashes (because I know what a big smoker he was). I miss you like the waves miss the ocean on a windy day!
-Mlle Noleyn.
